Friday, December 25, 2015

The question

A子さん:「B子、元気?」
B子さん:「元気です。」
A子さん:「あのね、彼氏は求婚しました!」
B子さん:「本当?こんやく?おめでとう!」

(Zくん:"Mmm... こんにゃく...")

Friday, December 18, 2015

スペイン語

Zさん:"Hey man, thank you for letting me stay at your place while I am visiting California."
Aさん:"Not at all.  Mi casa es su casa."
Zさん:"... that's great, but I don't really need an umbrella."

Friday, December 11, 2015

JLPT

(   )に入れるのに最もよいものをえらびなさい。

1。彼女を(   )する。

1. キッス    2.くそ


2。(   )に住んでいる。

1. うんち    2.うち

----------

Zくん:”Dude, is it just me or has the JLPT taken a rather dark turn this year?"


Friday, December 4, 2015

In Charge

Aくん:「すみません。新しい学生んですが、担当の先生は。。。?」
Zくん:"... um ... The Lone Ranger?"


Friday, November 27, 2015

Breakfast

弟:「おはよう。Hey, check it out.  I made waffles in the shapes of all the letters of the English alphabet. Pretty cool, huh?」
兄:「Man, I am starving. Give me those waffles.」
弟:「Hey! Leggo my 英語!」



Sunday, November 22, 2015

Zさん: “The State Department had its funding cut, so they have instituted a new policy.”
Aさん: 「Really? What is it?
Zさん: “外交: 15 minutes could save you 15% or more.”


Saturday, November 14, 2015

Taxi Fare

Aさん:「遅いです。If we are going to make it to the movie in time, we'll have to take a taxi.
Zさん:“I suppose, but taxis are expensive. In a way, they hurt my wallet. You might say...”
Aさん:「Oh please no...
Zさん:“間に合う、Money Ow.”


Saturday, November 7, 2015

The Enterprise NCC-1701-D is attacked by Godzilla.

Riker: "Captain, the only way for us to defeat Godzilla is to destroy the sleep in his eyes.  It is his one weakness.  Shall I begin the attack?"
Picard: "目くそ?Make it so."

Saturday, October 31, 2015

West Coast Baroque

Bさん: 「I have an idea.  Let's go to a バッ ハ。。。」
Zさん: “Baja California! Yes! The sun! The surf! The awesome weather!”
Bさん: 「。。。J S バッ ハ コンサート。 A performance of “Toccata and Fugue in D Minor"。」

Sometimes Baroque music concerts have a disproportionately large number of surfer dudes in the audience.


Saturday, October 24, 2015

Taxi.

Zさん:"Hey, get this.  How do you say 'I am a taxi' in Japanese?"
Aさん:「I dunno, how」
Zさん:"わたくしはタクシー。"
Aさん:「。。。つまんないつまんない。」


Saturday, October 17, 2015

"Ski-ing"

Bちゃん:「Zくん、スキー好き?」

Zくん: “ 'Do I like the mental process of liking'? That raises an interesting philosophical point. Could anyone actually dislike the mental process of likingUnless you instead meant 'skiing with skis', but I am not sure how one would go skiing without skis.”

Bちゃん:「ばか。好きじゃない。スキーしない。」


Sunday, October 11, 2015

Brad Pitt は 家に帰ります。

Brad: "ただいま"
Angelina: "Hi you!"
Brad: "... um... 女優..."

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

The Caribbean.

Zさん:"Did you hear?  There was an outbreak of a new strain of chicken pox on several Caribbean islands.  Over 10,000 infected."
Aさん:「Wow.  So that means...」
Zさん:"Yup, 一万... itchy...mon."

Saturday, October 3, 2015

ごみがある。

Bさん:「ごみを出してください。」
Zさん: “Yeah, that is one of those few things in life that is both 臭い and 面倒くさい.”


Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Commander Sulu meets Q.

Sulu: 「So you're 九。Well, then, who is number 1?」

Saturday, September 26, 2015

禁煙です。Zさんはタバコを吸っています。

Aさん:「すみません。吸いません。」
Zさん:"... 一回だけで十分だよ。"


Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Aさん:「Remember the rock songs from the '80s? They were so upbeat and filled with hope.
Zさん: “Yeah, 楽観, man!”

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Siblings

Aさん:「Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Zさん:“I have two younger sisters, both named Susan.”
Aさん:「Well, if they are both named Susan, how do you tell them apart?
Zさん:“The older one we call Sue, the younger one we call Sue Echo.”


Saturday, September 19, 2015

An auction?

ZさんはBさんを手伝った。

Bさん:「Zさん、優しいです、ありがとう。Thank you!
Zさん: “四十”
Bさん:「。。。オークションじゃない。」


There's some ginger.

Aさん:「あっ。残念、しょうがない。」
Zさん: “ショウガあるよ。”
Aさん:「。。。」