This blog is one gaijin's attempt to learn Japanese through mnemonics, puns, and general linguistic absurdity.

Looking for Fractalsmith Games? Sorry, but Ed Siewert, the creative force behind Fractalsmith has decided to focus his efforts on making cheesy Japanese puns instead of cheesy computer games.

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Celery in Space

Zさん:"Have you heard about the NASA satellite that is measuring the amount of water in the top 2 inches of soil everywhere on the Earth’s surface?  It is called Soil Moisture Active Passive* or S.M.A.P. for short."

Aさん:「I thought they broke up.」



*NASA really has a SMAP mission, I'm not making this up.  https://smap.jpl.nasa.gov 


Friday, August 25, 2017

Takeout Chinese

Zさん:"ただいま!"
Bさん:「おかいり!」
Zさん:"I brought home takeout Chinese.  Where do you want to eat?"
Bさん:「居間。」
Zさん:"I said 'where' not 'when'."
Bさん:「。。。」

Friday, August 18, 2017

太陽

Aさん:「アメリカでは月曜日に皆既日食が起こります。」
Bさん:「本当?みたい!」

ミスタースパーコル:"Mmm... 日食..."

Saturday, August 12, 2017

勉強しようよ

Zさん:"So, what was your favorite class back in school?"
Aさん:「算数。」
Zさん:"... you studied the art of war? ..."



Friday, August 4, 2017

バート & Katsuo

Zさん:"You know, I've been thinking about it and Bart Simpson and いそのカツオ are really quite similar."
Aさん:「How so?」
Zさん:"Well, they're both spiky-haired, trouble-making tween-agers, they both do poorly in school, and each of their best friends is a non-nerdy kid with glasses, Milhouse and ひろし."
Aさん:「Quite true.」
Zさん:"... and ... they each have two sisters and no brothers, and their fathers are bald and have angry catch phrases: 'Why you little!' and 「バカモン!」"
Aさん:「All very true, but you forgot the most important thing.」
Zさん:"What's that?"
Aさん:「Each of their respective shows jumped the shark decades ago.」
Zさん:"。。。なるほど。"