This blog is one gaijin's attempt to learn Japanese through mnemonics, puns, and general linguistic absurdity.

Looking for Fractalsmith Games? Sorry, but Ed Siewert, the creative force behind Fractalsmith, has decided to focus his efforts on making cheesy Japanese puns instead of cheesy computer games.

Friday, March 25, 2016



Zさん:"すなつな。”
Aさん:「What?」
Zさん:"すなつな。”
Aさん:「I don't understand。。。」
Zさん:"Soon a tuna will jump out of the ocean and land on the beach..."
Aさん:「Ok。。。」
Zさん:"...and then the tuna will become covered in sand, or 砂, making it a 砂ツナ."
Aさん:「。。。 I get it.  So, soon a tuna 砂ツナ!」
Zさん:"Soon a tuna 砂ツナ!"
Aさん:「So。。。 soon a 砂ツナ食べるな。。。」
Zさん:"Depending on the amount of 砂."


Friday, March 18, 2016

トマトを言う

Zさん:"Aさん, you're a trivia buff, right? I have some trivia questions for you."
Aさん:「OK, shoot.」
Zさん:"If you have a bunch of old junk you don't need, you put it in... what?"
Aさん:「Strage.」
Zさん:"What do you call a large funnel-shaped twister storm?"
Aさん:「Tornad.」
Zさん:"What is the capital of California?"
Aさん:「Sacrament. ... ah... I get it... very well, I have some trivia questions for you as well.  What do you call singing along to pre-recorded pop songs in a bar?」
Zさん:"Carry Okee."
Aさん:「What do you call ritualistic Japanese suicide?」
Zさん:"Harry Carry."
Aさん:「What do you call Japanese open-hand martial arts?」
Zさん:"Ka Rah Tee... ok, ok, I see your point.  Touché."
Aさん:「Hmm, you know, I bet we'd both struggle with フランス語。」 


Friday, March 11, 2016

ミスター・スパーコル

社長:「景気はいいので、新しい従業員をやといます。」
Bさん:「よかったですね。」
...
Zさん:"Mmm... ケーキ."
...
Aさん:「。。。ミスター・スパーコルみたい。」


Friday, March 4, 2016

R.P.S.

Aさん:「Hey, Zさん , glad you could make it!  I'd like to introduce you to some friends of mine.  This is Jonathon Smith, Kenneth Jones, and Charles Pawn.」
Zさん:"Nice to meet you, ... Jon, Ken, ... Pawn."
Pawnさん:"Nice to meet you too, 。。。あいこでしょ。"