This blog is one gaijin's attempt to learn Japanese through mnemonics, puns, and general linguistic absurdity.

Looking for Fractalsmith Games? Sorry, but Ed Siewert, the creative force behind Fractalsmith, has decided to focus his efforts on making cheesy Japanese puns instead of cheesy computer games.

Friday, September 13, 2019


Eさん:「Hi, Zさん, I would like you to meet my grandson, Dくん, 孫です。」
Zさん:"Not a magical bloodline, huh."

Saturday, September 7, 2019

米国 v 日本, Part I

Zさん:"In America, there are singing competition reality TV shows. Prospective stars compete before an audience both live and in people's homes. Through survival of the fittest, it is pretty much guaranteed that the winner will be a very talented singer.

"In Japan in the 90s, there was a boy band called SMAP. Their leader was a guy by the name of Masahiro Nakai. He was charming, witty, and handsome. However, he could not sing at all -- completely tone deaf. But because he had the personality of what the leader of a boy band was supposed to have, he got the job."

Friday, August 23, 2019


Zさん:"Hi, Bさん. Wow! That's a beautiful tattoo on your hand!"
Bさん:「Thanks! Yeah, it is an Indian design. Henna Tattoo です。」
Zさん:"... well, it is a little unusual, but I wouldn't go that far."

Friday, August 16, 2019


Zさん:"... so this song is about taking a spaceship to a distant star cluster and bringing back souvenirs?”

Friday, August 9, 2019


Zさん:"The kanji for 包む makes me smile. It's like two つ's wrapped up together."

Friday, August 2, 2019

Emotionally Weary

Zさん:"Question: How does one go from 疲れた to 疲れはてた?"
Aさん:「I don't know.」
Zさん:"Add 'hate'."

Thursday, July 25, 2019


Zさん:"Watch out! Our boss, Ms. Smith, is pissed because our team missed the deadline."
Zさん:"Not just Lee, she may kill all of us!"